City of Unwanted Adventure
by RedcurrantSmoothie
Summary: When Clary and the gang travel to Dublin to meet up with Magnus' old friend Skulduggery, they never expected to be caught up in all the drama and adventure in Skulduggery's world, just as the drama in their own had settled down. Post CoG and Mortal Coil
1. The Beginning

**This is my first attempt at a crossover fic, so don't shoot me if it's bad!**

**This is set two months after Mortal Coil and six months after City of Glass (just pretend that the City of Glass events happened in 2010 not 2007).**

**Disclaimer- As much as I'd like to own the series I don't because Mortal Instruments belong to Cassandra Clare and Skulduggery Pleasant belongs to Derek Landy!**

The airport was packed and Clary could barely hear herself think for all the noise. People kept barging into her -accidentally of course- and it was hard to navigate herself to the front desk. It was the first week of the summer holidays and everyone was itching to leave the state and fly somewhere warm for a holiday. Clary wasn't going anywhere warm though; she was going to rainy Ireland with Jace, Isabelle, Magnus, Alec and Simon.

"I still don't see why we couldn't just portal over," Jace groaned.

"Ssh!" Alec said, putting his fingers to his lips "You don't want any mundies hearing about portals do you?"

"Portalling would have been so much easier," Jace said, ignoring Alec's comment. "Instead we have to wait in this mangy, mundie airport for two hours and if we don't get crushed first then our eardrums will burst from all this noise!"

"You think you've got it bad? Try having vampire hearing! I can hear stuff coming from the planes outside!" Simon joked.

"Ssh!" Jace said, mimicking Alec in a girly voice that sounded nothing like Alec's voice. "You don't want any mundie's hearing about vampires do you?" Both Simon and Alec shot Jace an evil glare, though nothing that could blow Isabelle's death stares out of the water.

"Can you all just be quiet for one minute?" Isabelle groaned. "You're all so immature!"

In a bid to change the subject Clary pointed towards the desk and led them there to get their luggage weighed. Knowing Isabelle, her hand luggage would be double the amount it normally should be because of all the random junk in it that she wouldn't need. Fair enough putting in some magazines, a phone, an iPod, a purse or maybe even some makeup, but Isabelle had her hair straighteners, her hairbrush, dozens of necklaces and even a change of shoes! Why Isabelle would need straighteners for a plane journey Clary would never know. However, while Isabelle was known for her makeup-and-hair obsession, Magnus was even worse with his glitter-and-guyliner obsession, so she dreaded to think what was in his bag. There wasn't a limit on hand luggage, but there was on normal luggage and judging on how much was just in Isabelle's handbag, there was no way it would be within the 23 kilo limit.

"Hello," grinned the girl behind the counter who looked like she was in her late twenties. She had dyed blonde hair. Clary could tell it was dyed because nobody had hair _that _blonde with eyebrows _that _dark, not that you could tell because her eyebrows had been plucked so much they looked like a very thin line drawn on with pencil. "Where are you going?"

"Dublin, Ireland." Alec said in a flat tone, without any hint of emotion in his voice.

"Ooh, I've never been to Ireland. Is it for pleasure or business?"

"Pleasure, we're visiting some relatives." Alec lied. They weren't actually visiting any relatives, they didn't even have any relatives in Ireland, but instead were doing Clave business. Although strictly speaking, it wasn't technically Clave business as they hadn't been called there but Magnus had some warlock friends in Ireland and they'd told him that they were in trouble. Naturally, Magnus agreed to help them and got his boyfriend and friends to come with him. Magnus hadn't actually told them what the danger was, but he said it was Shadowhunter related so it could be classed as Clave business.

"How lovely! Now would you put your luggage here please, we need to check how much it weighs."

Alec was the first to weigh his luggage. His plain black suitcase was 10 kilos less than the limit. Clary wasn't surprised really, Alec didn't care much for clothes and shoes so he only packed the necessaries. Jace was next, his camouflage suitcase was almost over the limit but it was 0.1 short so he didn't have to pay extra. Clary wouldn't what he had in there. Probably a few dozen mirrors so he could stare at his own reflection for entertainment. Simon's badge-adorned blue suitcase weighed the same as Jace, and surprisingly Isabelle's bright pink suitcase didn't tip the scales either. Neither did Magnus' rainbow suitcase, which was probably the biggest shock to her. But when it was Clary's turn, her flowery suitcase -the same one she'd had since she was five- went over the limit. She gasped; how come her suitcase was too heavy but Isabelle and Magnus' were fine? She'd tried to hard to pack light and hers wasn't filled with junk.

"Ooh, it's 2 kilos over the limit. You're gonna have to pay the fine I'm afraid!" said the girl, in a slightly forced perky voice. Groaning, Clary fished a few dollars from her purse and handed them to the girl behind the counter. Had Isabelle snuck a few of her things into Clary's suitcase? Yes, that seemed to be the likely explanation.

When they were out of sight, Clary decided to confront her. "Isabelle, how come my luggage was over the limit when everybody else's was fine?"

"Oh Clary," Isabelle laughed. "We used a lightening Rune!"

Clary was astounded. There was a Rune to make things lighter and she hadn't used it?

"How come nobody told me?"

"Well I don't know, but seeing as your angelic powers allow you to create new Runes we assumed you knew all about them!" Jace mocked. Clary scowled.

"Well, are flight isn't for another two hours, what shall we do now?" Simon asked the group.

"I have an idea…" Magnus said, with a seductive look in his cat eyes.

Fletcher hated the rain. Usually when it was raining he'd simply teleport himself to Australia, or somewhere else where it was warm, but now that he was part of a team he couldn't exactly just leave randomly all the time. Of course, that didn't stop him from teleporting; he often took Valkyrie for trips around the world, but they could never stay too long as Skulduggery might get annoyed. Although it seemed like Skulduggery was annoyed at Fletcher no matter what he did. He figured that he was just jealous of his awesome hair.

Drumming his fingers on the wooden table, something which always wound Skulduggery up, Fletcher waited impatiently for his girlfriend to arrive. Fletcher was waiting at Skulduggery Pleasant's house along with Ghastly Bespoke for Valkyrie Cain to arrive. Skulduggery said they were expecting guests from America this evening, a mage, a vampire and four people called "Shadowhunters." Fletcher was unsure what that term meant. Were they people who hunt shadows? That didn't seem very exciting, especially because shadows don't really cause any harm. Perhaps it was just an American term for Necromancers, although that was highly unlikely seeing as Necromancers wouldn't want to hunt shadows but embrace them. They loved darkness and death. His girlfriend was studying Necromancy, something which Fletcher and Skulduggery didn't really approve of- one of the few things they had in common.

"Fletcher either find something else to do, preferably something to fill that empty head of yours with some intelligence or just stop tapping your fingers." Skulduggery snapped. He didn't have his façade on so he was his usual skeleton self.

"Fine," Fletcher said, running his fingers through his blonde hair. Strutting towards the large mirror on the wall, Fletcher began to tease his hair into the usual spiked style that Skulduggery usually called the hedgehog look. He was just jealous that Fletcher had gorgeous blonde hair when he didn't have any. Fletcher looked at his reflection and smiled. He was gorgeous and wasn't afraid to admit it.

"What time are our guests supposed to arrive?" Ghastly asked, not looking up from his book. He was studying a book about remnants, presumably to see if there was a cure for Tanith who unfortunately had a remnant bound to her two months back. Once a remnant had been inside of you for four days then it was permanently bound to you, but poor Ghastly was so heartbroken he'd never stopped searching for a cure, though he never showed his desperation.

"She should be here now, she just had to collect a few things from home." Skulduggery replied, peering out the window. Fletcher wondered how a normal passer by would react if they saw a skull head poking through the curtains.

"What time are our American friends arriving?"

"They should be here in approximately an hour and a half, depending on traffic."

"Traffic? What in the air?" Fletcher joked.

"Oh yes, the sky can get very busy sometimes with all the witches on broomsticks and flying monkeys and such." Skulduggery said sarcastically. Fletcher ignored that comment and carried on staring at his reflection. He looked good, as always.

At that moment, the beautiful Valkyrie Cain entered the room. She was wearing the protective clothes that Ghastly made her, a long black coat with sleeves the colour of dried blood, black trousers and tall black boots. Her dark hair was loose around her shoulders and a subtle hint of eyeliner and mascara painted around her brown eyes. Fletcher's mouth hung open. How lucky was he to have a girlfriend who could look so hot without even trying? He hated to admit it but she looked almost as good as he did.

"Shut your mouth Fletcher or you'll catch flies," the brunette smirked. "Have our guests not arrived yet?"

"Judging by the fact that the house is not filled with endless high pitched banter of 'hey' and 'girlfriend' I'd say no." Skulduggery said flatly. Fletcher could tell that he wasn't looking forward to housing American guests, even if one of them was his friend. He felt sorry for the people coming to stay, Skulduggery wasn't exactly the most pleasant person to be around despite his last name. He wondered how they'd all fit in his house, it wasn't exactly the biggest place in town. But then again, where else could they stay? Valkyrie lived with her parents who didn't know about magic so they couldn't stay there. Ghastly's house was smaller than Skulduggery's and he doubted he would trust new people in his shop as he'd fear they might steal or break something. Fletcher didn't really have a home; he'd just teleport to random hotels and stay there without having to pay. They couldn't stay with Tanith because now that she had a remnant inside of her goodness knows what could happen, the temporary sanctuary was off limits and they definitely couldn't stay in an ice cream van with the zombies Scapegrace and Thrasher. Maybe they could stay with Ravel, but he wasn't sure if he even knew about the American guests. The only other place he could think of would be the Hiberian Cinema, but that didn't seem like a good idea now what Kenspeckle was gone.

"Hang on, I'm getting a text." Valkyrie said, feeling around in her coat pocket for her phone. "It's from Magnus, they're here. They've landed in Dublin and they're at the airport now."

**So how did you find it? It's my first crossover so be nice :D Review and you'll get the pride of knowing you reviewed!**


	2. Ways to Kill Time

**Sorry for the long wait! I wrote half of this on my mum's computer during the time where my computer broke, then completely forgot to go back to it once I got it back. Then a few weeks ago my computer broke again so I had to go back to using my mum's which I couldn't do often, but today I was really bored so I decided to write the rest!**

**Also I should be getting my computer back next week so I can update Be Careful What You Wish For, in fact that will be the first thing I do seeing as the next chapter was mostly written before it broke.**

**Disclaimer- Last time I checked, I don't own Mortal Instruments or Skulduggery Pleasant, and neither do I own Aslan, and I don't even own the quote where I mentioned him; I stole it from Russell Howard's Good News (although I changed it so it's not dirty!)**

The first thing Jace experienced when he stepped onto Irish soil was rain. And Jace _hated _the rain. It messed up his hair for one thing, and for another it was cold, dreary and _wet. _You could have a lovely day packed full of exciting activities, but add some rain into the mix and it would ruin everything and dampen the mood, no pun intended.

Jace was standing at the bus stop along with his adoptive siblings Alec and Isabelle, Alec's boyfriend Magnus, Clary's best friend Simon, and Clary, his girlfriend. They were waiting for a bus, which didn't look like it was about to turn up, so they could go to Magnus' old friend Skulduggery's house. Again, Jace didn't see why they couldn't just portal over, but as usual nobody listened when he suggested this. He turned to Simon, who was keeping his eyes peeled for any signs of incoming traffic. He didn't seem to be affected by the rain or the cold, except for getting wet by the rain, but he was a vampire and didn't have any body heat to be affected by the cold. He, on the other hand, was definitely being affected by the cold, though he was trying not to show it. He was only wearing jeans, a t-shirt and a thin jacket. Magnus had warned him earlier on that Ireland would be colder than Brooklyn, but he didn't think it would be _this _cold. He saw Alec holding hands with Magnus. Alec was wearing his trademark brown sweater and jeans combo, but was probably wearing several layers underneath.

The rain grew even heavier. "Why can't there be sheltered bus stops?" Jace mumbled to nobody in particular.

"Why, can't take the rain?" Simon chuckled. Vampire hearing, even if Jace had whispered it as faintly as he could, Simon would be able to hear it was if it was declared through a megaphone.

"No, but for Clary's sake. She might be getting cold." Jace lied, whilst taking his girlfriend's hand.

"Liar, I can see you shivering you know," Clary laughed. "And I'm not that cold actually because unlike you, I actually listened to Magnus and dressed warmly."

"Alec, what time is this bus meant to be here?" Jace asked, ignoring Clary's comment. "We've been waiting here for ten minutes now."

"Well, it was supposed to be here five minutes ago." Alec shrugged.

"Well it's not here, check the timetable again."

Alec sighed and looked at the bus time table which was nailed to the post signifying the bus stop.

"Um, Jace," Alec gulped.

"Yes, brother?" Jace replied in a slightly patronizing tone.

"The bus…"

"We've missed it haven't we?"

"Yep."

"Great. So when is the next one due?"

"Well, only one bus runs an hour and we missed the last one by seven minutes, so it'll be about forty minutes…"

"Forty minutes? What are we supposed to do for forty minutes?"

"I have an idea…" Magnus said.

"Oh great not another one of your famous ideas…"

"Well do you have a plan for what we can do for the next forty minutes?"

Jace was about to speak, but found that he didn't have anything to say.

"Good. Here's what I propose…" Magnus began.

Magnus' plan at the airport was fun, but caused them to almost miss their flight and involved a run-in with the airport security guards. Magnus had suggested that they scare some mundies, something which Jace was definitely up for. If there was one thing he loved more than annoying Simon, it was annoying mundanes. First, he, Alec, Clary and Isabelle would put up their glamours so they were invisible to everyone except Downworlders, Demons and other Shadowhunters, but Magnus and Simon would talk to them as normal which would freak the mundies out, although Jace found that rather boring. The more interesting part was were he would sneak up on unsuspecting travellers and poke them, steal things from their pocket and on one occasion, trip them over which _really _freaked them out. He'd have liked to do more things like push them over or pull their hair or even grab their arm and stop them moving, but Alec protested that they'd think the airport was haunted and it was ghosts who were pestering them. One trick that was really fun, was when he sat on people's luggage while it was being weighed. Jace may have been invisible, but he still had weight. The look on their faces when their luggage was revealed to weigh the added weight of the luggage _and _Jace's body put together was priceless.

However, the last trick almost caused them to miss their flight. Magnus had suggested that they raided one of the many gift shops and start rearranging things in the store so nobody could find what they wanted. Simon and Magnus would distract the buyers by asking questions such as where the nearest toilets were or where they were headed, whilst Jace, Isabelle and Clary (Alec didn't want to participate) would take the object they were about to pick up and hide it. Seeing the people search frantically for the item was hilarious. Especially as when they thought they'd found it, it would 'mysteriously' disappear and end up somewhere else. Unfortunately, they spent too long in the giftshop, that was at the other side of the airport, and had to sprint to the terminal, which was no problem for Simon due to his vampire speed, and Isabelle, Alec and himself were fast anyway but unfortunately for Clary she hadn't been trained as much so ran out of breath pretty quickly, and Magnus was fast but not as fast as the others. And Clary had accidentally forgotten to put the postcard she was holding back, so the security guards -their glamours had worn off- took her back to the shop and made her pay for it, delaying them even more.

"They're here? Already?" Skulduggery said. "Guess we'd better go and collect them then."

Valkyrie shook her head, "I thought they were getting the bus?"

"Valkyrie," Skulduggery began, "this is Magnus Bane we are talking about. I doubt he's ever travelled on something as ordinary as a bus in all of his 800 years. We're picking them up."

Valkyrie tried to imagine the warlock on a bus. With his jet black hair adorned with a multitude of assorted glitters, he wouldn't exactly blend in with the other passengers, who were usually old pensioners. She'd never met the man before, but she'd seen enough pictures and heard enough stories about him to understand that he wasn't exactly _normal_. Then again, an elemental necromancy-student whose best friend was a skeleton and boyfriend was a teleporter wasn't exactly _normal_ either.

"Are you sure about that, Skulduggery?" Ghastly, ever the practical one, asked. "You'd better ring up and check first, they may already be on their way here."

"Nonsense, we'll drive over and pick them up now."

Ghastly rolled his eyes, then went back to reading his book.

"Right, I'm off to pick them up now, Valkyrie are you coming?" Skulduggery asked, placing his dark sunglasses over the holes where his eyes should be. Valkyrie was about to answer when Fletcher spoke up.

"Would it not be easier if I just teleported over?" Fletcher suggested. Valkyrie didn't think Skulduggery would agree, despite everything Fletcher had previously done for him, he still didn't like him very much.

"No, Fletcher, we'll drive over. They'll probably all have heavy luggage anyway." Skulduggery answered, though his mind seemed elsewhere, like he was distracted.

"Dude, if I can teleport two hundred people to the middle of nowhere, I can easily teleport six Americans with suitcases." Fletcher smirked, in the typical conceited manner in which he always talked.

Skulduggery sighed. "I know, Fletcher, but I don't know if they'd, erm, trust you to take them home. After all, _Shadowhunters _don't trust our kind much. Anyway, I know Magnus so he trusts me, well hopefully, and he'd be expecting me." Skulduggery had said 'Shadowhunters' as if it were the worst way to insult somebody. It was strange, Valkyrie had thought, how she had never heard of them before today. They were part angel and killed demons to prevent them from sucking all of the energy away from the earth, surely they weren't _that_ bad?

"Besides, do you even know where the airport is?" Skulduggery asked, a perfectly legitimate question, but his sincere tone made it seem almost like he was teasing him.

Fletcher was about to open his mouth to retort, but found he had nothing to say.

It wasn't surprising. Fletcher could teleport anywhere in the world; why would he need to use an airport?

Five minutes later, Valkyrie and Skulduggery were riding in the Bentley on the way to Dublin airport. Ghastly was staying behind with Fletcher to try and get the house ready for the guests. Most likely Fletcher had teleported away as soon as he could to avoid chores. That, or his idea of 'help' was polishing the mirror, which of course was an excuse for him staring at his reflection. Or perhaps he had put up a few pictures of himself on the walls. If it was possible to marry yourself Fletcher would have a long time ago.

Skulduggery seemed tense, and it was bothering her. Why was he getting so worked up over these visitors?

"Skulduggery?" Valkyrie mumbled.

"Yes?" Skulduggery replied, looking straight ahead, not at her. Although if he did look at her then the car would crash, so Valkyrie wasn't bothered about the lack of eye contact.

"What's so bad about Shadowhunters? I mean everyone seems to hate them."

If Skulduggery had eyebrows he would have raised them. "Do they?"

"Yes, and before you said 'Shadowhunters' as if it were the filthiest word in the world and I want to know why. I mean, they defeat demons, surely they're not that horrible?"

"Valkyrie, we don't _hate_ them. Okay, maybe a little, but that doesn't mean we don't have any respect for who they are and what they do."

"So _why _do you hate them?"

"Because," Skulduggery sighed, "they look down on everybody else who isn't one of them. Shadowhunters? They're top dog, the ones in charge. Everyone else? Mortals, or mundanes as they call them, vampires, warlocks, werewolves et cetera? Bottom dog. Which is stupid in my opinion, seeing as we've been around longer than they have."

"Well, you are a few hundred years old." Valkyrie joked, but Skulduggery seemed to take it seriously.

"Not in _that _context. Shadowhunters are mortal, yes, but they've only been around for a century or so, whereas people like sorcerers and faeries have been around since pretty much the beginning of time."

"Wait, faeries?" Valkyrie gasped. Faeries belonged in books; they were just stories told to little girls. Of course, she never believed in them. The whole idea of tiny winged creatures with magic wands and flowered dresses never really appealed to a tomboy like herself.

"Yes, faeries." Skulduggery repeated.

"You mean they exist?"

"Of course they exist."

"But they're just myths?"

"Valkyrie," Skulduggery chuckled, "in case you haven't noticed, _magic_ is a myth, and that's something you use pretty much every day."

"I've never seen one."

"That's because they mainly live in the Seelie Court, or the faerie realm, not in Ireland."

"So what other creatures are there that you've never told me about?"

"Well, as far as the Shadowhunters are concerned, there are Shadowhunters, also known as Nephilim, and then there are Downworlders, who are split into four groups: vampires, werewolves, faeries and warlocks, which is what we'd be classed as, even though that's a load of rubbish seeing as were are clearly mages."

"Um, is there a difference?"

"Warlocks are half-demon, the result of an affair between a Demon and a mortal which is why they can do magic. Mages like us on the other hand are just people who can use magic, and there is nothing demonic about them."

"Are you sure? Serpine, Vile, Vengeous, they all seemed pretty demonic." Valkyrie said, thinking of some of the worst villains she'd encountered, and the ones whom she'd only heard tales of, none of which had been pleasant ones you'd tell your children as a bedtime story unless you were truly sadistic.

Skulduggery said nothing, so Valkyrie continued with her questioning. "So why do they class warlocks and mages as the same?"

"I don't know." Skulduggery shrugged, "perhaps there are more warlocks in Idris, their home country, than there are mages. But both definitely exist, no matter how much they don't believe it. Or maybe it's just the American Shadowhunters who think that way, although I highly doubt that because there's the American Sanctuary as well as all the American Institutes."

Valkyrie nodded, although she still didn't get it, but she just pushed it to one side and instead looked out of the window and listened to the pitter-patter of raindrops bouncing off the car roof.

Magnus' plan wasn't as devious as Alec had expected it to be. It involved no glamours, no stealing, no run-ins with security guards. Instead, they had to try and 'gross out' as many passers-by as they could. It was raining, so not many people were outside, but there were plenty of people in the coffee place across the road.

For the next forty minutes, everyone was going to perform intense PDAs- public displays of affection. Alec was horrified; kissing Magnus in front of everyone during the Idris battle was hard enough, but he never wanted to do that again. Not that he didn't love Magnus of course, he loved him with all of his heart, but not everybody was comfortable with it. His parents definitely weren't, not that they'd ever admit it, and he'd seen enough looks of disgust on people's faces when they held hands in public, so kissing was out of the question.

"Are you sure? I mean, not every body is, erm, okay with this sort of thing." Alec had protested, fidgeting with the end of his sleeve like he always did when he was unsure of something.

"Of course, it'll be fun, won't it?" Magnus had replied, his bright green cat eyes gleaming as he said so. Alec had sighed, then sighed again, then he agreed, much to his boyfriend's satisfaction.

Of course, Jace and Clary were up for it. They were kissing whenever they got the chance anyway. Then again, if Alec had thought that Magnus was his brother while he loved him, then realised he wasn't, he'd have been spending as much time with him as possible too.

Isabelle and Simon, however, weren't as comfortable, despite the fact that they been on-off dating for the past month, and kissing hadn't been a problem for either of them before.

"What's the problem, vampire? Too chicken?" Jace had smirked.

"There's no problem, I just think PDAs are tacky." Simon had groaned, and Alec had to agree with him there.

"PDAs are tacky, eh?" Magnus had smirked. "So, what happened in Idris was just a-"

"Shut up." Alec had said sullenly, not letting him continue.

Anyway, as usual, nobody listened to Alec or Simon and they carried on with Magnus' plan. Of course, they would listen to Magnus. Then again, he could shoot blue fire at you or force-feed you dangerous concoctions if you didn't listen to him, so most people in their right mind did. Well, in theory Magnus could, but nowadays his biggest threat was to make you over into a clone of him, complete with the rainbow trousers and enough glitter to give a pixie a run for her money.

Grabbing Clary by the waist, Jace was the first one to make a move. _Disgusting, _Alec thought, _have they no shame? _It seemed like everywhere they went they would find any excuse to make out, and this time was no exception. In a strange way, Alec was jealous of them. They didn't care what anybody thought of them and they were so comfortable with each other and nobody else bothered them, whereas before Magnus Alec was so far in the closet he was having tea parties with Aslan. They didn't have to worry about one being immortal either, but Alec preferred not to dwell on that subject much despite the fact that one day it was something he'd have to face. For the moment, however, he kept those thoughts pushed to the very back of his mind.

Jace pulled himself away from Clary to tell everybody that they were chickens, then returned to his girlfriend. Already they were getting looks of disgust from people nearby.

"Alec, darling?" Magnus said sweetly, batting his heavily-make-upped eyelashes.

Alec sighed. _Oh well, here goes nothing._

And Magnus pulled him in close and kissed him like he'd never kissed before.

**Yay for Malec love!**

**Also…**

**REVIEW!**

**REVIEW!**

**REVIEW!**

**Did I mention review?**


End file.
